Cecily Zamora
The idea of co-parents-in-law marrying each other has been portrayed in popular culture, such as in the TV shows The Simpsons and How I Met Your Mother. While it may be legally possible in some places, it is generally considered taboo due to the squick factor of a family romantic relationship and the discomfort of adult children thinking about their elderly parents engaging in a sexual relationship. In Judaism, there is no explicit prohibition against co-parents-in-law marrying, but it is advised to have the children perform Tannaim first before the parents' marriage. From a legal perspective, the federal definition of family relationships does not list a father-in-law and mother-in-law as being related by family, but individual lenders may still consider it a non-arm's length transaction when evaluating financial transactions involving the families.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Is it legally allowed? | No law prohibits co-parents-in-law from marrying each other. |
| Social acceptance | Most people are uncomfortable with the idea of their parents having a sexual relationship. |
| Religious acceptance | In Judaism, there is no prohibition, but it is frowned upon if the children grew up together. |
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What You'll Learn
In the US, co-parents-in-law can marry
In the United States, there are no federal laws prohibiting co-parents-in-law from marrying. While it may be uncommon and considered taboo by some, it is not illegal for a husband's father and a wife's mother to marry. This scenario has been portrayed in popular culture, such as in the television show How I Met Your Mother, where Lily's father dates Marshall's mother, and in The Simpsons, where Marge's mother dates Homer's father.
The legality of such marriages may vary depending on specific state laws and cultural or religious norms. For example, in Judaism, there is no explicit prohibition against co-parents-in-law marrying according to R. Yehudah ha-Hasid. However, it is recommended that the children perform Tannaim first before their parents' marriage.
It is important to note that societal perceptions of such relationships may differ, and there may be social consequences or stigma associated with co-parents-in-law marrying. Additionally, in certain situations, such as financial or property transactions, lenders and investors may consider the relationship between co-parents-in-law as a factor in their decision-making.
While co-parents-in-law can legally marry in the US, it is always advisable to seek legal counsel for specific guidance on marriage laws and any potential implications.
In conclusion, while societal perceptions may vary, co-parents-in-law can legally marry in the United States, provided there are no other legal impediments, such as blood relations or existing marriages.
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In Judaism, there's no prohibition on in-laws marrying
Judaism considers marriage a good thing that fulfills a religious requirement. Marrying and having children is a personal obligation of every Jewish man. However, there are certain prohibited marriages in Judaism, such as marrying one's daughter, granddaughter, great-granddaughter, daughter-in-law, and so on.
In Judaism, there is no prohibition on in-laws marrying. According to the Testament of R. Yehudah ha-Hasid, step-siblings are prohibited from marrying each other, but this only applies when the parents are married first. If the children marry first, there is no issue with the parents marrying afterward. In such cases, it is sufficient for the children to have the Tannaim performed, and they need not be technically fully married before the parents' marriage.
There are anecdotes of such marriages from previous generations, usually involving older parents who could no longer provide for themselves. By marrying each other's in-laws, their children could maintain one residence for the parents instead of two.
While there is no blanket prohibition, it is generally discouraged when the children have grown up together as it is not considered proper.
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Step-siblings can marry, but not if their parents marry first
In Judaism, there is no rule prohibiting step-siblings from marrying each other. However, according to R. Yehudah ha-Hasid, if the parents of the step-siblings are married first, the step-siblings cannot marry. This is because the step-siblings would then be considered related. If the step-siblings marry first, there is no issue with their parents marrying afterward.
In other legal contexts, there is no explicit prohibition against step-siblings marrying. For example, in the United States, it is not illegal for step-siblings to marry, as long as they are not related by blood. However, social norms and personal discomfort may play a role in how such relationships are perceived.
In some cases, the line between step-sibling relationships and incestuous relationships can blur, particularly when step-siblings have lived together and been raised as siblings. This can create complex family dynamics and social perceptions, as illustrated in the example of Marge and Homer from "The Simpsons."
It is important to note that the legality of step-sibling marriages may vary depending on the specific location and cultural context. While some regions may have no legal restrictions, others may have laws or religious guidelines that prohibit such marriages, especially if they are perceived as incestuous.
To summarize, while step-siblings can generally marry, the situation becomes more complex if their parents marry first. In such cases, the step-siblings may be considered related, and their marriage could be prohibited or perceived negatively in certain cultural or religious contexts. Therefore, it is essential to consider the specific circumstances and seek appropriate legal or religious guidance if needed.
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It's possible to be unrelated by blood but related by marriage
It is possible to be unrelated by blood but related by marriage. This is the case when discussing the relationship between a father-in-law and a mother-in-law. While they are not related by blood, most people would consider them to be related by marriage. This relationship can also be applied to step-siblings, who are not related by blood but can be related by marriage. For example, in the TV show The Simpsons, Marge's mother dates Homer's father, making them step-siblings.
In terms of the law, the relationship between a father-in-law and mother-in-law is not listed as a family relationship. However, in the context of a short sale, most lenders and investors would consider this a non-arm's length transaction due to the possibility that the selling price was influenced by the relationship between the parties. This demonstrates that while there may not be a legal definition of this relationship, it is generally understood that a father-in-law and mother-in-law are considered related by marriage in certain contexts.
Additionally, in Judaism, there is no prohibition against co-parents-in-law marrying each other. The only consideration is the teaching of Reb Yehudah Hachasid, which prohibits step-siblings from marrying if their parents are married first. However, if the children marry first, there is no issue with the parents marrying afterwards. This further illustrates that the concept of being unrelated by blood but related by marriage is recognised and accepted in certain contexts.
Overall, while there may not be a legal definition or prohibition of the relationship between a father-in-law and mother-in-law, it is generally understood that they are considered related by marriage in certain contexts, such as financial transactions and religious teachings. This concept of being unrelated by blood but related by marriage also extends to step-siblings, as demonstrated by examples from popular culture and religious texts.
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People may find the idea of in-laws marrying uncomfortable
While there are no laws prohibiting in-laws from marrying, the idea of co-parents-in-law marrying each other can make people uncomfortable. This discomfort may stem from societal norms and expectations, as well as the perceived "squick factor" of sexual relationships within a family context.
In some cultures and religions, there are specific prohibitions against step-siblings marrying, which can extend to the children of married couples becoming step-siblings. However, these prohibitions do not always apply when the children marry first, and there are also examples of religious figures marrying their step-siblings.
On a more personal level, individuals may feel uncomfortable with the idea of their in-laws marrying due to concerns about family dynamics, financial disparities, and interference in their marriage. For example, if one set of in-laws is seen as the "wealthier" or "more generous" grandparents, this could create feelings of insecurity and inferiority. Additionally, in-laws may offer unwanted advice, attempt to control decisions, or interfere in the couple's relationship, leading to tension and conflict.
In-laws may also struggle to accept their children's spouses, leading to feelings of discomfort and resentment. This can manifest as comparing a spouse to their child's ex-partner, badmouthing them to other family members, or attempting to control various aspects of their life, such as where they live or how they raise their children. Establishing boundaries and open communication between couples and in-laws can help navigate these challenges and reduce discomfort.
Furthermore, the idea of in-laws marrying may challenge societal expectations of family structures and relationships. This can be particularly true in cases where step-siblings or half-siblings are involved, as it may raise questions about genetic relationships and the potential impact on future children.
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Frequently asked questions
No, you cannot marry your father-in-law as that would be considered incest.
There is no law prohibiting co-parents-in-law from marrying each other. However, it is generally frowned upon due to the "squick" factor of a family romantic relationship.
In Judaism, there is no explicit prohibition in the Torah or Talmud regarding co-parents-in-law marrying. However, Reb Yehudah Hachasid prohibits it, and it is generally discouraged if the children grew up together.
While there may be no legal restrictions on co-parents-in-law marrying, there could be implications in areas such as short sales or loan applications where lenders might consider such a relationship as non-arm's length, affecting their willingness to do business.
In the TV show How I Met Your Mother, Lily's dad dates Marshall's mom, and in The Simpsons, Marge's mom dates Homer's dad.
