Cecily Zamora
Deciding who to tell about your pregnancy first can be a difficult decision. Some people prefer to tell their parents first, especially if they are close with them and would want their support in the event of a miscarriage. Others may opt to tell their in-laws first, particularly if they have a good relationship with them and would benefit from their support during the pregnancy. Ultimately, the decision depends on personal preferences and the dynamics of the relationships involved. While some may choose to share the news as soon as possible, others may prefer to wait until after the first trimester when the risk of miscarriage is lower.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Timing of announcement | Many people wait until after the first trimester to announce their pregnancy due to the risk of miscarriage being much lower after this point. Some also wait until after they have had an ultrasound and received the results. Others choose to tell their parents as soon as they find out. |
| Method of announcement | In-person announcements are common for partners and parents, and some also choose to tell their immediate family in person. Phone calls, cards, and social media posts are also used to announce pregnancies. |
| Who to tell first | Some people feel strongly about telling their own parents before their in-laws, while others leave it to their partner to tell their respective parents at the same time. |
| Level of support | The level of support that can be expected from parents and in-laws may influence the decision of when and how to announce a pregnancy. |
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What You'll Learn
When to tell your parents and in-laws
When it comes to sharing the news of your pregnancy with your parents and in-laws, there is no one-size-fits-all approach, and the timing is entirely up to your personal preference and circumstances. Here are some factors to consider when deciding when to share your exciting news:
Your Comfort Level and Relationship
Consider how comfortable you feel discussing your pregnancy and any potential concerns with your parents and in-laws. If you have a close and supportive relationship with them and would want their support in case of any challenges or losses, you may choose to involve them early on. On the other hand, if you prefer to keep this information within a smaller circle until you feel more confident, that is also completely valid.
Timing of Ultrasound and Prenatal Appointments
Many parents choose to wait until after their first ultrasound or prenatal appointment, which typically occurs around 7 to 10 weeks, to confirm the viability and dating of the pregnancy. This can be a great time to share the news with your parents and in-laws, as you may have a sonogram image to include in your announcement.
Risk of Miscarriage
It is important to consider the risk of early pregnancy loss, which occurs in about 10% of known pregnancies, with 80% of miscarriages happening during the first trimester. For this reason, some people prefer to wait until after the first trimester, when the risk is significantly lower, to share their news.
Method of Delivery
Think about how you would like to share the news with your parents and in-laws. In-person announcements are often preferred for close family members, but if they live far away, virtual calls, phone calls, or even sending a thoughtful card can be wonderful ways to convey your excitement and involve them in your journey.
Your Inner Circle
Consider who else you plan to include in your inner circle of support. Some people choose to tell their parents and in-laws at the same time as their closest friends, while others prefer to have a private celebration with their partner before involving extended family.
Remember, there is no right or wrong answer, and you should trust your instincts and do what feels most comfortable for you and your partner. Enjoy this special time and cherish each moment as you prepare to welcome your little one!
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Telling your parents first
When it comes to sharing the news of your pregnancy, there is no "right" time or way to do it. It is a personal choice, and you should trust your instincts and do what feels most comfortable for you. Many people choose to wait until after the first trimester to share the news, as the risk of miscarriage is much lower after the first 12 weeks. However, if you would want the support of your parents in the event of a miscarriage, you may want to tell them sooner.
If you have a close relationship with your parents and would want their support throughout your pregnancy journey, it is natural to want to tell them first. You could share the news in person, over the phone, or through a pregnancy announcement card. Some people like to include their parents in their inner support circle right away and may even want to surprise them with the news together with their partner.
It's important to consider your unique situation and what you feel comfortable with. If you have a good relationship with your parents and would want their support, telling them first can be a special way to involve them in this exciting time. On the other hand, if you prefer to keep the news within your immediate support circle initially, that is also completely valid.
Ultimately, the decision of when and how to share your pregnancy news is yours alone. You may want to consider your relationship with your parents and how you would feel discussing any potential problems with them. If you would want their support and guidance throughout your pregnancy, telling them first can be a wonderful way to strengthen your bond and include them in this new chapter of your life.
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Telling in-laws in person
Deciding when and how to tell your in-laws about your pregnancy can be complicated. Many people choose to wait until after the 12-week scan, as the risk of miscarriage drops significantly after the first trimester. However, if you would want the support of your in-laws in the event of a miscarriage, you may want to tell them sooner.
If you want to tell your in-laws in person, consider how close you are with them and how you think they will react. If you have a good relationship with them and they will be excited about the news, you might want to plan a special way to tell them. For example, you could bring out a cake that says "We're expecting" on it, frame your sonogram photo for them, or send them a pregnancy announcement video if they live far away.
On the other hand, if you are not close with your in-laws or anticipate that they may be nonplussed, disapproving, or judgmental, you may want to wait until you are further along to tell them in person, or even choose not to tell them directly at all. Ultimately, the decision about when and how to tell your in-laws is a personal one, and you should do what feels most comfortable for you and your partner.
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Waiting for the first trimester
Some people prefer to wait until after the first trimester to tell their in-laws about the pregnancy. This decision often depends on the relationship and comfort level with their in-laws. If a miscarriage occurs, some people may not feel comfortable discussing it with their in-laws, so they choose to wait until after the first trimester when the risk is relatively lower.
However, others may want the support of their in-laws in case anything happens. It is essential to consider your relationship and how much support you may need during this time. If you have a good relationship and would want their support in the event of a miscarriage, telling them earlier can be a good option.
Additionally, the first trimester can be a time to focus on your overall health and make any necessary lifestyle changes. Pregnancy can impact various aspects of your life, including work, finances, habits, and daily activities. It is a period to prioritize early pregnancy care, address any worries or concerns, and seek support from healthcare providers, midwives, doctors, partners, friends, and family.
Ultimately, the decision to tell your in-laws about your pregnancy during the first trimester is a personal one. It is essential to consider your relationship, comfort level, and the support you may need during this exciting but crucial time.
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Sharing the news over the phone
Sharing the news of your pregnancy over the phone can be a great option, especially if you are not able to meet your parents or in-laws in person. Here are some things to consider when deciding whether to share your pregnancy news over the phone:
Timing
Many people choose to wait until after the 12-week scan to share their pregnancy news, as the risk of miscarriage decreases significantly after this point. Some people may also prefer to wait until the second trimester to announce their pregnancy. However, others choose to share the news as soon as they find out, especially if they would want support from their parents or in-laws in the event of a miscarriage. Ultimately, the timing of when to share your pregnancy news is a personal decision, and you should do what feels comfortable for you.
Privacy
If you choose to share your pregnancy news over the phone, be aware that your parents or in-laws may not keep the news confidential. They may want to share the excitement with other family members or friends, so be clear about your expectations for privacy if that is important to you.
Practical considerations
When sharing the news over the phone, try to choose a time when you know your parents or in-laws are available and undisturbed. This will allow them to fully focus on the conversation and ask any questions they may have. If you are calling internationally, consider any time zone differences to ensure you are not calling in the middle of the night!
Making the call
When you make the call, be prepared for a range of emotions and reactions. Your parents or in-laws may be thrilled, shocked, or even initially silent as they process the news. Remember to speak clearly and slowly, and you may want to have your partner on the call with you for support. You could also consider video calling so that you can see each other's reactions and feel more connected despite the distance.
Following up
After sharing the news over the phone, you may want to follow up with a text message, email, or social media announcement to let other family members and friends know. This can also be a way to share your ultrasound photos or any creative pregnancy announcements you have planned. Remember that sharing your pregnancy news is an exciting and personal moment, so do what feels right for you and your partner!
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Frequently asked questions
There is no "right" answer to this question, and it is ultimately a personal choice. Some people prefer to tell their parents first, while others choose to inform their in-laws initially. It depends on factors such as personal comfort, the relationship with each party, and the level of support desired.
Telling your parents first can be a natural choice if you have a close relationship with them and seek their support during the pregnancy. It may also be a special way to honour your parents, especially if it is their first grandchild.
Yes, it may be preferable to inform your in-laws first if you have a strong relationship with them and value their support. Additionally, your partner may be eager to share the news with their family, and it can be a meaningful moment for them.
Many people choose to wait until after the first trimester to announce their pregnancy due to the risk of early pregnancy loss, which is higher during this period. However, this decision is personal, and some couples prefer to have their support network in place in case anything happens.
There are various ways to share the news, including in-person meetings, phone calls, video calls, or even sending a card or email. Some people prefer to share the news with their partner and parents simultaneously, making it a special moment for their immediate family.
